[stephenkhoo]

Wednesday, 15 February, 2012, 6th Week in Ordinary Time, Cycle 2
PERCEPTION AND EXPERIENCE ARE NECESSARY IN COMING TO KNOW GOD AND OURSELVES
SCRIPTURE READINGS: JAMES 1:19-27; MK 8:22-26

The spiritual struggles of the community of St James are also ours. Like them, many of us also feel that we have not progressed very much in our spiritual life. Like them, we are still judgmental, short-tempered and defensive; deceiving ourselves; lacking compassion and contaminated by the world. Some of us have either a sharp or loose tongue. Yes, try as we might, we have not been able to rid ourselves of our impurities and bad habits. This is so even though most of us have tried to meditate on the Word of God as James tells us. We listen to the Word but forget it so easily, like the man who has a quick look at himself in the mirror and forgets how he looks like the moment he goes away. Such a situation does make many of us rather frustrated. That is why those of us who are serious in changing our life-styles can get rather impatient with ourselves and eventually give up trying.

Why is it that we find it so difficult to change even though we seem to have perceived the truth about life? The reason is simply this. As Emmanuel Kant says, “Perception without experience is empty.” Perception alone cannot change us. This is precisely one of the main points in today’s gospel reading. The gospel tells us that some people brought a blind man whom they begged Jesus to touch. Take note that they did not ask Jesus simply to heal, but to touch so that he might be healed. In a detailed description by Mark, Jesus then took the blind man by the hand and led him out of the village to heal him. Jesus healed the man sacramentally, touching him and his eyes with His hands. In this way, the man experienced the healing love of God personally.

This explains why many of us, in spite of our reading the scriptures regularly, do not experience a change in our lives. The truth is that like the man who sees himself in the mirror, it was only a quick look. There is no depth in our understanding of the Word of God. Ours is only a superficial reading, understanding and experience of the text. We do not come to experience Jesus behind the Word. Consequently, we do not see the Word as truly the perfect law of freedom. Without a deep experience of the scriptures as the Word of Freedom and the Word of Life, which is Jesus in person, no radical change will take place in our lives. Hence, it is not enough to simply meditate on the scriptures. Knowledge of God alone will not bring about a radical change in our lives. No, we need to experience Him concretely in our lives. Perception is important but we also need to feel His healing touch and His healing love as well; or else how can the love of God be poured into our hearts?

This all important fact is reiterated by Mark when he explicitly mentioned that Jesus led the man out of the village and after he was healed, He told the man not to re-enter the village. Why? Because the experience of God is a personal thing. It is not something that you can share fully. It is something that one must experience personally. For this reason, that man had to be brought out of the village. Only in this way, away from the stares of the crowd and the on-lookers, could the man avail himself to God totally; experiencing Him deeply and personally. For the same reason too, the man who was cured was told not to return to the village. Jesus, in Mark’s consistent motif in his gospel, did not want people to know that He is the Messiah through others. The Messianic secret must come from a personal discovery and not simply from hearsay.

On the other hand, it does not mean that we will come to understand Jesus nor ourselves simply because we have experienced Him in our lives. This fact is also illustrated in the earlier part of Mark’s gospel when he told us that the disciples were still blind in perception even though they had witnessed the miracle of the multiplication of the loaves. They could not see that Jesus was the Messiah. They were still blind! This same truth is further highlighted in today’s gospel. Although the blind man was healed, we are never told that he followed Jesus after he was healed, like blind Bartimaeus who followed Jesus down the road to Jerusalem. Instead, he was asked to go back home. Jesus did not ask him to follow Him. Even though he was healed of his physical sight, he still had not totally “seen” Jesus as the Messiah; and hence could not yet follow Him.

And this is certainly the case of many faithful who have experienced God, be it within the Charismatic movement or in other religious groups. Some even have had visions of the Divine at prayer or during retreats. Some claim to have seen our Lady in Medjugorje or in Naju, up on the hills, on the lamp-posts etc. But they are still the same, long after they have returned from their pilgrimages. There has been no change in their lives. They had the experience, but still continue to live ignorant lives. Why? Because they have no perception of the truth as yet. Consequently, we must also conclude with Kant that “experience without perception is blind.”

In the final analysis, we must realise that growth and conversion is the result of a mutual growth in perception and experience. Our experience will influence our perception; and our perception will open up the avenues for our experience. It is a rare gift indeed that one is enlightened and converted overnight, as in the case of St Paul who was struck down by the light while riding his horse. Nay, for most of us, as it was for the disciples, we come to experience and know the Lord in stages. It is true that coming to faith in Jesus is a gift; yet coming to grasp the revelation of God often takes place in stages, just like the blind man who was healed in stages. Most of us, like the blind man, see life and truth imperfectly. But things become clearer as we continue to affirm our faith in Jesus.

Perception and experience is therefore cumulative. We do not come to know God all at once. Indeed, this is a central theme of St Mark’s gospel; that the disciples came to understand that Jesus is the Son of God only gradually. God’s grace does not destroy our humanity. Rather, God’s grace perfects our humanity. St Thomas Aquinas says that we cannot know the truth all at once, but by believing and through believing we can then verify for ourselves the truths that we hold through study and understanding. There are many things about our faith and life that we will never understand. In faith, we should recognize that life is a mystery and we need not resolve every puzzle in our life, the contradictions we live in, the unexplained questions, etc. By surrendering in faith to the mystery of God and trusting in His divine providence and mercy, we will come to experience His loving care and His presence seeing us through every step in our life.

We must therefore be patient with our spiritual growth. We need time to understand life, God and ourselves. As we understand, so will we change. We cannot coerce change when we are not yet ready. Change can only come from within – through a deep insight and a deep experience of the heart. In the same vein too, just as we must be patient with ourselves, we must also be patient with others in their personal and spiritual growth. We must not condemn them or judge them. We must not give up hope on them. They, like ourselves, are all trying and waiting for God’s grace, to be touched and healed by Him.

Finally, since perception and experience are both gifts from God, we must earnestly pray for these gifts so that we will come to know Him more and more; and hopefully one day be able to declare that He is Lord of our lives; and submit our lives to Him as St James exhorts us.